Oh No

The kinda-date went really well. Bill and I met up at a bar in the city, accompanied by all my PT friends. I was actually really impressed because he made an honest effort to talk to all of them and learn their names. Like, a serious effort. We all went to a karaoke bar in China Town and he sang, which impressed me because if it was me and a bunch of people I didn't know, I'd be too chicken shit to do it. He actually has a great voice. His friend came with him (I think he has a thing for Amy) and they said they would drive us home. On the walk to the car, my friend saw a huge picture in the Pandora store window of a skull charm bracelet and I almost had a heart attack. I LOVE skulls. I don't know what it is about them, but I think they are so freakin cool and I'm obsessed. Bill was like "what's with the skull fascination?" and I'm like "honestly, I don't know. I just love them." They drove us to Amy's parents' house and Bill kissed me goodnight, then texted me when he got home to say goodnight and that he had a really good time. Last night, he sent me a text all like "I have to show you something I know you'll love" and sent me a picture of a skull bowling ball he saw when he was out bowling with his friends. This is gonna sound SO lame, but my heart melted with that. I literally mentioned my skull obsession once for maybe a second and he remembered it. Also, the getting to know my friends thing was new to me; no guy I ever went out with ever did stuff like that.

Part of me is skeptical though. Honestly, after asshole, my guard is up big time and its gonna take an amazing guy with fucking endurance to break it down. Part of me is wondering what Bill's motive is: is he looking for ass, a "right now," or what? I also have to make sure to move this thing slowly, if it moves at all. I didn't think I would like this guy in "that way" but the more I talk to him, the more I do, and it's scaring the shit out of me.