Welllll I suck. Big time. I royally messed up my diet last night with too many drinks, a big ass slice of pizza for dinner, and a late night food run at 3am. Actually, the pizza fell in plan because I was still under my calories and macros, and the drinks did too cuz I budgeted for them, but I didn't see the after-hours binge coming. I was STARVING and at 3am, I'm really not in the mood to grill chicken or eat beans and brown rice. But now I feel like a huge bloated failure. I tried a pair of khakis on that I'm gonna need for clinical and they are clinging on for dear life. They were tight before, but they are ridiculous now, to the point of cutting off circulation. I really want to get back on track but it is so unbelievably hard. I don't know how I got this far off the wagon, and it sucks. It makes me feel like a big fat loser. UGH.
I'm gonna try something new today; instead of flying on a whim with meals and snacks and stuff, I'm planning EVERYTHING and throwing it into the MFP tracker. This way, when I get hungry I don't have to think about what I'm gonna eat cuz I already know. This is gonna take some work and is a time commitment but it NEEDS to happen. I also went on Pinterest and pinned a bunch of recipes I can make this week when I get back to school with stuff I already have at home to break the monotony being that I've been eating the same effing meals for the past 2 months!! So there are 87 days left which is roughly 3 months; if I can drop a pound a week, that's 12 pounds by the deadline, which is where I was when I started P90X last year. Once I get back on my own and away from the temptations of being at my parents' house, it might be a little easier to stick to plan.
Speaking of going back, I really wish Amy had her clinical close to where we live now instead of going back to the city to do it. We want to move out SO badly, but she doesn't wanna pay for a month of rent when she doesn't need to, and I don't blame her. I chose to do my clinical near school because I figured I'm already paying June rent at our house so I might as well take advantage and stay there. Too bad the majority of our housemates suck. It's three girls and three guys; my douchebag landlady decided to squeeze two people into one room because she is a greedy fuck. That turned into a huge battle because it violated our lease that specified FIVE people max, so I called her out on it and got my rent reduced by a lot. Let me tell you, living with six people blows, especially when half of those people are dirty, lazy fucks. I don't get how these people function; one girl is a princess and God forbid you ask her to take out the garbage. She acts like you asked her to dispose of hazardous waste and forget it if she already took a shower cuz then taking out the garbage ain't happening. Her idea of cleaning the bathroom is running a we cloth on the counter. Oh and she hasn't washed her sheets since we moved in in JUNE. Gross. And this chick is in her late 20s so she is old enough to be past the college phase. Now we have the boys; they don't empty the dishwasher, they leave dirty dishes in the sink for weeks (no exaggeration), clog our toilets and don't bother to unclog them, don't take out the garbage so it overflows onto the floor, steal other people's food then deny it, leave caked on crud all over the stove and counters...do I need to go on?! Actually, one of the three guys is great because he actually cleans and goes out of his way to help us girls. We call him the dad of the house. Scary thing is he's the youngest but by far the most mature. He sent me a pic this morning that got my blood boiling: a wad of gum stuck to our coffee table because one of the roommates was too lazy to throw it out. Are you fucking kidding me?! Holy crap I'm dreading going back. I'm seriously contemplating living in my car for the next 3 months. At least I know I can't get sepsis there.
No comments:
Post a Comment